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The second part of “Poker Patter”, a look at the colourful vocabulary of the poker table, covers some of the obscure and humorous nicknames assigned to Texas Hold’em hands. If you ever found yourself wondering why your opponent was talking about his “Flat Tyre” in the middle of a hand, you might not have realised he wasn’t referring to his car. Perhaps you were confused as to why the rest of the table suddenly started talking about tennis, after a player showed her AK? Read on, as the murky vocabulary of the poker table becomes that little bit clearer.
The Gay Waiter: An amusing play on words, this term refers to the starting hand Q3, which could also be described as a Queen with a Trey. You don’t need it spelling out!
The Dead Man’s Hand: This is fairly well known and comes from the story of “Wild” Bill Hickok, who was shot in the back of the head whilst playing five card draw. He died holding two pair, Aces and Eights. In Hold’em, the starting hand A8 is also called The Dead Man’s Hand.
Anna Kournikova: Remember her? The name became one of the most common Google search strings as fans sought out images of the attractive part time model and ex-tennis pro. The thing is, she wasn’t really very good. Amusingly, the Hold’em hand AK bears her initials and has similar qualities – it looks great, but it doesn’t win much.
Montana Banana: The origin of this rhyming nickname for the starting hand 92 is unclear. There is an urban myth that Proposition 92 legalised poker in Montana, but this is false. A more amusing theory is that bananas will grow in Montana before anyone shows a profit playing the hand.
Flat Tyre: Another play on words, you may hear a player refer to his J4 as having a “Flat”, or a “Flat Tyre”. The inquisitive but inexperienced player will ask why and will be asked, to the amusement of the table, “what’s a jack for?”
Presto: An exclamation usually heard when someone wins holding pocket fives, it is thought to have originated on internet newsgroups in the 90s. Originally a term used for a natural 21 in blackjack, poker players wanted their own “Presto!” hand and attached it to 55 after hearing of several hands where the fives had miraculously won.
German Virgin: This is an alternative name for 99, also known as “Phil Hellmuth” after he won the World Series of Poker Main Event holding two black nines. The “German Virgin” nickname is far wittier, however; imagine a fair German maiden being pressured into sex and then imagine her pure, innocent response: “Nein! Nein!”
So now you know a few hand nicknames and how they came about. These terms won’t improve your game, but they might liven up your next poker game!
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